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Hedge Fund Job Titles Defined

Hedge Fund Analyst A person who spends their day tracking the activities of people whose job they would have liked.
Quantitative Researcher A person who can attach probabilities to future events by looking backwards.
Portfolio Manager A person who has an enormous breadth of knowledge across a range of industries and is an expert in none of them.
Strategist A person who spends their day looking down at global events from 25,000ft but never has to land to take an active decision themselves (see “ Journalist” and “Consultant”).
Head of Quantitative Solutions A person qualified to Ph.D level who used to earn an annual bonus at a CTA.
Head of Risk The person who stops portfolio managers earning a bonus.
In-House Marketer A person who can ascribe someone else’s success in the firm to their own activities.
Chief Operating Officer The person who is thought to keep hedge funds running as businesses.
Deputy Chief Operating Officer The person who actually keeps hedge funds running as businesses.
Chief Investment Officer The guy whose name is on everyone’s business card.
Head Trader Chief Algo Selector
Compliance Officer Fulfills the statutory requirement to have a fifth column in every firm in the financial sector.
Head of Compliance Chief Snitch
Head of Technology The only person in the firm authorised to have self-defined mission-critical costs no-one else understands.
Head of Investor Relations The person that works with the most important existing clients to tidy up the s*** created by the CIO.
Chief Executive Officer The person individually chosen by the founder and Chief Investment Officer to buy the paperclips and liaise with the auditors.

The Wall Street Book Everyone Should Read

In 1997, though, such arguments were pretty close to unheard of. Which is what makes Doug Henwood’s book Wall Street, published that year, such an amazing document. Along with explaining in clear if caustic terms how financial markets work, the book prefigures almost every criticism of the financial system that’s been levied since the crisis of 2008. An overleveraged housing market?Check. A link between financial sector growth and income inequality? Check. A natural tendency toward instability in financial markets? Check.

I don’t want to paint Henwood, who edits a newsletter called the Left Business Observer, hosts aweekly radio show, and knows more about economic indicators than anyone has a right to, as some kind of Nostradamus. In Wall Street he doesn’t so much make predictions as expose, in his crotchety, almost absurdly erudite way, the inconsistencies and contradictions in conventional views of how the financial world is supposed to work. (more…)

One Out Of Every Ten Wall Street Employees Is A Psychopath, Say Researchers

Maybe Patrick Bateman wasn’t such an outlier.

One out of every 10 Wall Street employees is likely a clinical psychopath, writes journalist Sherree DeCovny in an upcoming issue of the trade publication CFA Magazine (subscription required). In the general population the rate is closer to one percent.

“A financial psychopath can present as a perfect well-rounded job candidate, CEO, manager, co-worker, and team member because their destructive characteristics are practically invisible,” writes DeCovny, who pulls together research from several psychologists for her story, which helpfully suggests that financial firms carefully screen out extreme psychopaths in hiring.

To be sure, typical psychopathic behavior runs the gamut. At the extreme end is Bateman, portrayed by Christian Bale, in the 2000 movie “American Psycho,” as an investment banker who actually kills people and exhibits no remorse. When health professionals talk about “psychopaths,” they have a broader range of behavior in mind.

A clinical psychopath is bright, gregarious and charming, writes DeCovny. He lies easily and often, and may have trouble feeling empathy for other people. He’s probably also more willing to take dangerous risks — either because he doesn’t understand the consequences, or because he simply doesn’t care. (more…)